...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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