Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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