she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
She needs sedatives and a leash
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
