my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
