I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
