I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
