I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
