whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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