i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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