hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like iHOP with fire
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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