I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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