we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
