Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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