well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
We left the knife in your bed.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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