She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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