hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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