Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
