i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
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i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
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It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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