You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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