hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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