There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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