you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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