ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
We are all done wearing pants today
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
