white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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