so that wasnt chicken after all
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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