remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
