i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
you didnt know i had herpes?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
