So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
