M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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