just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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