More tranny stories later!
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
