we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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