I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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