: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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