I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
