11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I didn't shave. On purpose
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
