Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize