some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
