Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You ate ashes out of my bong
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize