Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
