Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
