I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize