Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
