That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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