she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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