Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
