There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
