Please, let me fuck your mom
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
