Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
