i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
