it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
