Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
